The Art of Saying 'No': How to Stop People Pleasing and Transform Your Life

ve spent a few hours this morning putting together a brand new training and workbook for the guys inside of my Alliance program

It’s called “How to STOP People Pleasing and Be Happier and Healthier”

I’ve been fascinated by it

I actually used to be BAD for it

In fact, I still struggle with it now

Trying to reply to every email

Trying to answer ever questions I get asked and every DM I get (its a LOT)

But I’m better, for sure

I used to say yes to things I really didn’t want to do

Take on too much

Take on other peoples problems

Felt guilty about doing things that I really wanted to do

Go places I didn’t want to go to

Not give my actual opinion and just agree with people so I didn’t rock the boat

Man, it was exhausting

I’d actually end up ANGRY

At the people I was tying to please

And it MYSELF for being such a pleaser

Until I finally understood one thing

PEOPLE PLEASING IS HARMFUL

Both to myself AND everyone else

Like I said, I ended up angry and resentful

I had to deal with the consequences of saying yes to things all of the time

My family had to put up with my bad mood, even though it was them I was trying to ‘please’ and pacify

I became passive aggressive

And on the odd occasion?

I’d EXPLODE like a bloody volcano and it started to impact my overall happiness and health

So once I understand that it WAS indeed MORE harmful than saying ‘NO’ to people

It became WAY easier to say no…

Here’s a tiny little hack l use that made it easier

“I’d LOVE to say yes… but if I did? It would mean I have to sacrifice _____”

Trust me on this… THAT WORKS ^^

ALSO…

becomes MUCH easier to do if you have some super clear PERSONAL goals you’re working towards that have a POSITIVE IMPACT on the people around you